Turns Out It Was A Code Brown Day

Some days are just shit and we need a village to help mop it up

Jae L


Photo by Ben White on Unsplash

I never really know how a day is going to turn out but I often get a vibe pretty early on. When you’re autistic and have ADHD and anxiety, you can feel the layers of stress starting to pile on.

A week ago, I took my car for an annual service. That was my sole object for the day. But somehow it consumed the whole day and my sanity with it.

It was clear by about 7.30am that things were not going well. After circling the service centre and repeatedly exiting and entering the highway, I still couldn’t find the entrance. I finally pulled over in the side street and called them. Oh so it’s another block up the road. Excellent. Knowledge is power.

When I finally find my way in, there’s a convoluted triage process with men in high vis darting between the cars. At the end of the obstacle course there’s a young woman borrowing officiousness from the clipboard she’s clinging to. I tell her that there’s a problem with the handbrake that needs looking at and she says I need to make a separate booking for that as though it’s obvious.

Despite having told them that I would stay while it was done (they have a very comfortable and well-equipped waiting area), she insists I booked a 5pm pick up. There is no point arguing so suck it up and get out of the car and hand over the keys.

I stand there for a while because I have no idea how I’m going to get home. At 6kms it’s a manageable walk but it’s pouring rain. There’s no direct public transport. Clipboard girl has no suggestions for a weird annoying middle-aged lady.

Two trains and 1.5 hours later I’m back home and seething. Instead of returning to baseline, my anxiety continues to build in anticipation. I know where this day is going.

They call me at 4pm to let me know it’s done. My heart jumps when they tell me the cost but least there are no major issues with the car.

Thinking I’m ahead of the game, I book an Uber. At least I would have if the bloody app worked and didn’t start looping back to some glitchy bank authorisation step that I’m not entirely sure wasn’t a scam. It’s never done this before. I can usually book in a…



Jae L

Queer, neurodivergent and in the business of defying expectations. Doing my best to answer the questions I keep asking myself. diverge999@gmail.com